Small Zweibrücken Reunion in Berlin

I was certainly encouraged that someone I went to high school with contacted me today (he also contacted me about two weeks ago about it as well). He lives in London currently and he let me know he was in Berlin for business the next couple days.  So we got together on the Kurfürstendamm near his hotel and grabbed a bratwurst then sat down at one of my favorite hangouts, the Alt Berliner Biersalon for a beer. Did I mention that today marks 25 years since the last day of classes at our high school?  Coincidence? I think not.  :)

Anyway, so honestly James and I didn't know each other that well, but we still had a great time talking about what has happened to the both of us in the last 27 years.  We both went to college in Munich (for a short time we were there at the same time), and we both lived in Seattle as well at the same time for a few years in the meantime.  It was cool to catch up.  He had two other brothers that were there in high school the same time I was there and we all knew each other, but not really well.  

So we sat down for a beer, we were on the sidewalk seating very close to where people were walking by, and it started to rain a bit.  Then it began to rain hard, so they opened a VERY large awning that stretched probably 30 feet, but not quite enough to cover the front row.  Since James and I lived in Seattle, we stuck out the little bit of rain, even with an umbrella for a few minutes, but went under the awning after the deluge began.  A couple offered to share their table with us wet folk and we couldn't say no.  It was fun anyway.  Thanks for hanging out with me and letting me know you were in town, James!  Honestly, I had totally forgotten about it....

Anyway, as I was going to meet him, coming up out of the subway station I realized there was some kind of street party going on.  When I got to the street level, I realized it was a car show!!!!  I was so excited because I LOOOOVE old cars and rarely get to see the old European ones, so I was in heaven! They had closed of the Ku-damm (one of Berlin's main boulevards) and I got there early, so I was able to walk around a little bit.  After I got James as we were talking, I was also snapping photos of the cars... :) I was listening to him though.... I really was.  I'll try to post some pics tomorrow if I have some time after the job search.

Also today, Micah has been trying to save the last chocolate chip cookie she made a couple days ago for me, and wasn't sure if she could do it, but she brought it to church today and it was amazing.  Thanks, Micah, you're the best!!!

I have to say one last thing.  The weather has been very nice the past few days, but it has been incredibly humid.  I need to get used to this again because I have been in dry Spokane for the last 10 years.  I hope I can get used to it quickly!

So that's it from Berlin for tonight. Have a great week everyone and thanks for looking in on me.  As of today, almost 1800 hits on this blog!!  You guys are amazing! Thanks...

Major Anniversary Disappointment

I really wanted to write something tonight and I couldn't really think of much.  But the past day or two I have been just a little bit melancholy about something and I was talking to Matthias about it today so I figured I would share it on the blog as well.

This coming Tuesday, June 11, 2013 marks the 25th anniversary of my high school graduation ceremony.  My high school is in Zweibrücken, which is relatively far away from Berlin.  I really wanted to be in Zwei on that day because I wanted to take some video to be shown at the "all-years" reunion taking place in Las Vegas in about a month. I am so close (relatively speaking), but just can't afford to go.  Not to mention the fact that I am still in the midst of looking for a job and only having 30 days before possibly having to return to the states if I don't have a reason to be here. I just can't justify being away from Berlin for any amount of time right now.

I realized a couple days ago that I'm super bummed out about this.  I went to my 10-year reunion in Orlando, FL in 1998 and I remember catching the shuttle bus with Keith Z ('87) and I remember the conversation so well.  His co-workers asked him why he wanted to go to his reunion.  He told them that the school was like family, he couldn't NOT go.  I totally felt the same way.

As military brats we built a special bond somehow.  Honestly, when I first moved to Zweibrücken in my sophomore year of high school, I didn't realize how unique this group of people really was.  We were close, and we were a small school. We even had some middle school kids too, which means as a high school, we really were very small!  It was such a great group of friends!  Sure, we had cliques and jocks and nerds and the whole array of people, but there was something really special during that time.  By the time I graduated in 1988, there was a notable difference in the people that were there.  I really did enjoy a very fun and unique time in my high school years there. I will never forget my Zweibrücken family.

I say all that to just convey how special I regard those years there.  The last time I went there, in 1989, was to watch my two best friends Paul W and Kerry M graduate.  Since then, I have only dreamed of going back.  I'm so grateful to be back in Germany under amazing circumstances, and honestly I hope to be able to go back to Zwei any time I want to in the coming years, but the fact remains that I'm kind of mourning not being able to celebrate this this anniversary there.

In the whole scheme of things, this really isn't a very big deal.  I was coming home tonight and I'm still in awe of the fact that I'm in Germany.  I thank God regularly for allowing me to come here.  My dream is to be able to stay and if going to Zwei would hinder that IN ANY WAY, then I don't want to do it right now.  In my life the past two years (especially) I have had to sacrifice my time, money, and energy to fulfill my dream to return here with the hope to help out the church in any way that I can.  I don't want to jeopardize that on a frivolous trip (especially one that I cannot afford) when there are so many things that I need to focus on here in Berlin.  It's hard, but I believe it's the right thing.  For me, it's good just to write it down so that I can deal with how I feel about it, then I can move forward with the other more important things.

Well, on that note, I need to move on to bed, it's 12:30a.m. and I have church in the morning. Thanks for looking in on me!  Have a great rest of your weekend.  Follow your dreams, they're worth it!

God's Gift of Confidence. In Him...

Firstly tonight, I wanted to take a minute to thank all of you who read this blog.  I'm very grateful that as of the writing of this tonight, I have had nearly 1600 hits on my blog since it started, over 1100 of which have been in the last 45 days!  I have had people tell me that I talk a lot.  It's true.  I appreciate that I believe most of you work through the length and I hope you can see my heart.  I allow myself to be pretty transparent on this blog.  It's kind of my diary, so to speak.  I certainly would never put extremely personal issues that (I hope anyway) would make anyone struggle, but please let me know if you do have any concerns.  That said, as you can see I do have a lot on my heart when I do write, mostly because it's been a few days, or more, since I last sat down and put my thoughts on the internet for all to see.  What I'm trying to say with all this, is that I apologize for the length of some of my posts.  This is definitely written for me to just get things off my chest (good and bad) and for my family and friends to share this incredible experience with me.

Today was absolutely beautiful in Berlin.  The sun was out and it was warm and just amazing!  I was stuck in the house most of the day, but finally later in the afternoon, I had to get out.  So I decided that I wanted to go to Charlottenburg Palace (Castle?).  It looks more like a palace to me, but either way, it's very beautiful. I'll share photos on here and on facebook. Anyway, the grounds of this palace are pretty amazing. It's pretty large and I walked around most of it and through a good part of the gardens.  It was great with the sun starting to go down to just sit at a fountain and pray.  Not too many tourists around at 7pm, so it was nice and quiet. I remember coming here in 1992 but somehow it seems different now.  Not in a bad way, just different.  Might just be that I look at a lot of things with different eyes than I did before.  Not sure though.

Picture taken by me tonight 6/6/13 at about 8pm

I have to be honest, I'm still not used to the fact that I can go look at castles any time I want.  This country and this city are so amazing to me. For my German friends, you have such a special land.  I hope you appreciate it.  I hope I never take things like these for granted. I want to always be impressed by such things,  God willing....

Sunday at church I spoke with one of the leaders in the church here and said I wanted to be able to help out in some way in the Singles.  This particular person and I got together on Tuesday as well for lunch and just to hang out and had just a really super encouraging talk.  He assured me that my story isn't crazy (which seemed to indicate that I'm not either... whew!!)  and I was just able to share with him some of my dreams and some of my pain as well.  It's so good to have someone to just listen and not judge, but empathize with some rather painful things in my past.  I was very grateful to be able to do that with him.

Anyway, on Sunday, after I said I wanted to feel more useful, he suggested that I lead a short introduction sermon to the Singles group on Wednesday night (last night).    I had to make sure that I heard him correctly.  First I said I could do it in English and he said he could translate.  I figured either way, it was a good challenge and I decided to go ahead and try.  I sat down to write and everything just sort of flowed in German. As I practiced, it seemed like I could do it just fine in German.  Huh??? Really?  I was pretty shocked actually.  I did ask him to be ready just in case I couldn't think of what to say.  He agreed, of course. 

I was actually giving a short 10-15 minute intro to a older sister from Boston (64 years old) who lost her husband after 30 years, 12 years ago.  She basically said that she has learned more about love since his death than in their 30 years of marriage.  Everything that she had to say was very impacting about how she loves being single.  I talked a little bit about family and how we as single disciples should be just as much a family to each other as our physical families.  That God intended the church to be a family.  I used Mat 12:46-49,  1 Cor 12:7, 24b-26 and ended with Ecc. 8:15 as the scriptures.  Afterward, I had a lot of positive feedback on my lesson and I was super encouraged.

Oddly, I really wasn't too nervous, a little, yes, but not too bad.  I was confident of my own convictions on the subject of family in the church and my German has definitely improved, but really it was totally God who worked.  On that subject, it's been very encouraging, but somehow kind of hard to explain.  God has definitely blessed my being here in ways too numerous to mention here, but I think what I'm learning is that I am really trying to love and trust God and I've really put myself out there not only to get to Germany, but to improve myself.  God hasn't just answered prayers, he's blown them out of the water.  Not just little blessings but with seemingly HUGE victories for me. Really for his glory, but I'm just so humbled by it. I've never seen God move quite like this and it's really, well, humbling to be on the receiving end of such incredible things. I'm quite speechless about it, I'm really so blown away by how God has worked here. Can't wait to see the job he has in store for me! :)

Backing up a few days, on Friday (May 31), I had the chance to talk a bit with my landlord, letting him know that I was going to try to move out on 6/15 and that I would not be paying rent this month, seeing as how I paid already from 4/15 to 6/15, plus 300 Euros security deposit (about $400).  I figured then if I moved out on 6/15 I could at least get my deposit back and have some money to move into another place that was coming open.  Basically he told me that was not our agreement, that I paid for the full month of April on the 15th when I moved in!!!  I told him that was not my understanding.  Naturally, I agreed to pay rent on the 1st and did so for May. Anyway, to keep a long story short, I wasn't getting any money back was sort of the bottom line.  I was super angry with him, hurt and felt like he was just a swindler.  I tried to explain that this was the last of the money I came here with and that he has taken it all from me.  I was angry and frankly, became despondent. I finally told him that "I made a mistake and I'll have to live with it."  He tried to continue to explain to me and I responded sharply "Didn't you just hear what I said?  *I* made a mistake..." He stopped and left the room.  I was just L-I-V-I-D.  I called him the next day to say that I would go ahead and stay the whole time and he seemed very excited that I came to that conclusion.

I found out a few minutes before we talked that I was out of minutes on my phone, so I had to leave to go put some more money on it.  Of course, I always find these things out JUST after the store closes where I can do that close to home, so I had to cross town to do it.  I figured on the way, I needed to go pray.  I went to the bridge over the river Spree by where I usually catch the train.  I was really struggling with this.  I was in shock that someone would treat another human being that way.  Either way, I prayed because I was very sad for him, like Jesus said when he was on the cross, "They do not know what they are doing".  I really thought about it, if I can't show him Christ, and even love the guy despite how much HE was clearly in the wrong (in my mind at least), I HAD to show him Jesus.  After I got done getting my phone working again, I just sat on Alexanderplatz and thought and thought and thought.  I was really so devastated by this whole thing I was starting to just feeling numb.  For the next day or two I just didn't want to do anything.  Didn't want to do something good, didn't want to do something bad, just didn't want to do anything at all. Finally I chose to just be selfish and indulge my selfishness.

What I finally concluded was that either way I had a place to stay up to July 15th because I had paid that far in advance already and he agreed originally that I could definitely stay that long.  Not my first choice, but it was an acceptable compromise for both of us.

Here is where my last post about Billy Joel's "You're Only Human (Second Wind)" came in.  The song just reminded me of some very tough times in my life where I really didn't feel like I had any friends.  People liked me, but nobody wanted to spend any time with me.  You think I might be exaggerating, but I'm not.  For a time, I felt like I couldn't buy a friend.  It was an incredibly sad and discouraging time in my life.  One that I will prayerfully never experience again. I hope nobody has to ever go through that.  Despite the pain of that, I decided to (as the song says) get "a little faith so I could catch my breath and face the world again."  I can't think of more appropriate words.  I realized shortly after this time in my life, my faith is not based on how I'm treated by men and women (even brothers and sisters in the church).  It's all about me and God.  If I really believe God loves me and can truly do ANYTHING, I need to rely on him, not on friendships.  This was a HUGE revelation for me.  This song really spelled it out for me.  More than that, it challenged me on my selfish and sinful behavior that I had been wallowing in the past couple days.  It brought me to tears because the song reaffirms that we all make mistakes, you just have to get your second wind (God).  I felt so bad that I had allowed myself to take my eyes off God and just think about myself.  I felt the song was God saying, "Tim, I forgive you. Move On."

All God wants from us is to have a relationship with him.  When we are selfish, we can't be close to God. He's still there, but we have the choice how we live.  With him in purity of heart, or away from him doing things he has warned us will cause separation in our relationships with him.

So last night after the devotional, I got to hang out with Samea and Katja and we went to a little gyros place near his apartment. He invited me Monday to go with him there, not knowing that gyros (next to Mexican food) is like my favorite food.  So this was the 2nd time we went.  (Truthfully I went again today, because their gyros are soooooooo amazingly yummy.)  Anyway, after we had our fill of gyros, we all went back to his place until like 11:30pm.  I figured at that time I had better start heading home.

So Katja and I walked back to subway and as is my custom, I got on the train in the wrong direction....  I ended up at a place where I could change and go by another line home (not the way I had planned, but would have been fine).  So I got back on another train going the way I had originally intended.  I went to change to the regional trains and got on the train, only to realize it was going the wrong way. Now, in my defense, they were doing track maintenance or something and they didn't indicate WHAT direction they were actually going in, so I had to guess. As usual, I guessed wrong. There were no trains AT ALL going in my direction.   Hm. Anyway, I ended up one stop further away from home.  Then I was able to change there to a subway line to the very same subway line (and in the same direction) that Katja caught an hour earlier.  Of course, by the time I got to my stop on the subway, my bus had stopped running.  If I would have just caught the train with her, I could have caught the last one or even the one before that.  At any rate, I was able to catch a bus that got me closer to home, but the whole journey took me 1 hour and 45 minutes!!!  I finally got home this morning at 1:20a.m!
 Ugh....  I think I just need to stop over-thinking it and just catch the one I usually catch. Would have had some more time to chat with Katja if nothing else....

So I think that's enough for tonight.  It's midnight now and I'm meeting Christian tomorrow at 8am to pray, so I had better wrap it up!  Thanks for checking in on me and I appreciate everyone's love and support.  Please keep praying for a job for me. Thanks!!!!

"You're Only Human"

I was listening to my iTunes today and the Billy Joel Song "You're Only Human (Second Wind)" came on.  I had just been praying for God to give me some perspective about my being here, about making mistakes and being focused on the wrong things. I've been struggling with some things here that have been very intense in the past few days.  It's really my own sinful nature...

I believe God put that scripture in Eph. 6:12 on my heart which says, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood (other people who might sin against us, purity struggles, etc.) but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (temptations from satan)." (NIV)  Okay, to some my notes in parentheses may just sound weird, but it's really true.  I talked a little bit before about when you're trying to do something positive, losing weight for instance, that every possible (and seemingly impossible) distraction and obstacle comes up to derail your progress.  Am I right?

Anyway, that Billy Joel song came on and I really feel like the song was written about my life.  It's so crazy how accurate and painful it was to my heart.  On the other side, though, the theme of the song is about the fact that we ARE just humans, we're going to make mistakes. The tone of the song is so positive and it sounds like it was just fun to record the song (he actually laughs in the song).

The part of the song that just broke my heart was this section:
I survived all those long lonely days
When it seemed I did not have a friend
Cause all I needed was a little faith
So I could catch my breath and face the world again.

It just reminded me that I've come a LONG way to get here.  I'm still fighting my demons but I'm so encouraged that I'm here, that God has been extremely patient and forgiving to me.  I just have to remember what my life is about.  It's not about me or my comfort or my pleasure, it's about glorifying God.  This song has brought me to tears today numerous times, in a good way.  

I'm only human, I can choose today to give in to fear or my temptations, or I can catch my breath and face the world again.  Thanks Billy Joel, I've always loved your music since I was a kid.  Today I heard God's voice through your music and am going to be a lifelong fan of that song.   

I will be doing another update soon, hopefully tonight.  Thanks for checking in on me.  Please be praying for me to find work this week!  

Here are the full lyrics of that song (taken from metrolyrics.com): 

You're having a hard time and lately you don't feel so goodYou're getting a bad reputation in your neighborhoodIt's alright, it's alrightSometimes that's what it takesYou're only human, you're allowed to make your share of mistakesYou better believe there will be times in your lifeWhen you'll be feeling like a stumbling foolSo take it from me you'll learn more from your accidentsThan anything that you could ever learn at school
Don't forget your second windSooner of later you'll get your second wind
It's not always easy to be living in this world of painYou're gonna be crashing into stone walls again and againIt's alright, it's alrightThough you feel your heart breakYou're only human, you're gonna have to deal with heartache
Just like a boxer in a title fightYou got to walk in that ring all aloneYou're not the only one who's made mistakesBut they're the only thing that you can truly call your own
Don't forget your second windWait in that corner until that breeze blows in
You've been keeping to yourself these daysCause you're thinking everything's gone wrongSometimes you just want to lay down and dieThat emotion can be so strongBut hold onTill that old second wind comes along
You probably don't want to hear advice from someone elseBut I wouldn't be telling you if I hadn't been there myselfIt's alright, it's alrightSometimes that's all it takesWe're only humanWe're supposed to make mistakesBut I survived all those long lonely daysWhen it seemed I did not have a friendCause all I needed was a little faithSo I could catch my breath and face the world again
Don't forget your second windSooner or later you'll feel that momentum kick inDon't forget your second windSooner or later you'll feel that momentum kick in

Ballets & Bumblings, Buddies and Ball Games

I love trying new things. Usually.  Well, this week has been all about doing new things and really enjoying them.  It makes me sad when people are afraid to try new things, or to give something up.  I think for a while I was beginning to become that way, but I'm so glad God is helping me to see and experience new and amazing things.  The first, as you may have already read, is going to a honest-to-goodness ballet.  Actually, I went TWO nights in a row, and I loved it.  I've gotta be honest, I was skeptical, but this troupe, the incredible Ballet Magnificat! was pretty amazing.  They tell a story with their dancing and it's really inspiring. The first night was the story of the Israelites leaving Egypt in Exodus.  Then they talked a little bit about the birth of Jesus, then his death. The second night was a really cool twist (for me, at least) on the story of the prostitute Rahab in the Bible and even though she did not live a righteous life as a prostitute, that the Bible says her actions were righteous because she did a great deed, that probably saved the lives of some men. The story was set in 1970's cold war Soviet Union. Very interesting twist on this story. All in all, a really excellent depiction of this story through dance.

So, after the performances both nights, the dancers came across the street to Connections Library and ate and talked with some of us (who apparently are gluttons for punishment and don't like to get to bed until after 1a.m.!!)  Anyway, in all honesty and sincerity, I really felt like afterward that I had made some new friends through getting to know a few of them personally.  Got a chance to talk to Jonathan, Christina and Bethany and others there and was just super encouraged to hear about how they came to be in a Christian Ballet company.  I have to be honest, one of the more encouraging stories was one of the young ladies said she has been dancing for 27 years!  Can you imagine?  Ballet is brutal on the body, but she is still going strong. I was pretty blown away by that number.  I was still back in high school then!!  Anyway, thanks for sharing your stories and I will never forget you guys!!!

So I was very excited about hiking yesterday with the Singles.  I only had one person respond to say she would be coming.  I hoped that more people would come anyway.  So, Thursday night I sent out the specific instructions on where and when to meet, etc.  So Saturday morning comes around and I'm at the meeting spot and I wait about 30 minutes.  Nobody else showed.  It was raining and the one person that RSVP'd said she would probably not hike if it's raining because she didn't have any waterproof clothes.  No problem.  So anyway, I didn't have her phone number, but I did put my phone number in the email.  I figured she would call if we didn't see each other.

So, in my normal fashion (of late anyway), I got home and received an email from her that she was curious if she was the only one to show up.  She went on the hike despite the rain!  She never got my email because even though I hit "Respond to All" on the email, I realized afterward it only went to one person, and I'm not even sure who that was.  Ugh.  So even though I'd sent the info out, nobody really got it.  I was so frustrated and frankly really embarrassed.  We talked today and it was really just a comedy of errors.  I called Katja on Saturday morning to see if she could look at my email to make sure I had all the info correct.  We also discussed trying to reach this other sister, a very close friend of hers.  She misunderstood which person I was talking about.  In any case, nobody received the email, nobody called anyone else and at least one person enjoyed the hike...  Well, we still have the rest of Summer and Fall to organize others....  Just my "luck".

The day wasn't a total waste because I was able to spend some time walking around the city of Spandau, which is a really cool old city, I'll post a couple pictures of the city below.  Anyway, I was getting a bit cold and sat down for a coffee and did a bit of poking around the old town, took some pictures and went off to have lunch with a friend back in Berlin.

The friend I had lunch with was a guy I met in Spokane last year who I helped to learn German.  He got in Friday evening and we decided to have dinner together and we met on Alexanderplatz and went for Mexican food at Cancun Restaurant nearby.  I was definitely jonesin' for some good Mexican food and I was not disappointed.  Shredded beef enchiladas really hit the spot!!!  So yummy.  We stayed there until nearly midnight just chatting about anything and everything, then we headed out on the square and talked for another hour or more.  Finally, about 1:15 a.m. I figured we had better had get going because I had to be up for the hike and all the way across town by 10 a.m.  I finally got home at 2:10 a.m.(after 30 minutes walking home from the subway) and went to bed shortly thereafter.  Eight o'clock sure did come early yesterday!!  I did make it up to Spandau at 9:56 a.m.  Just made it!  Anyway, too bad I wasn't able to meet the sister from church.  Oh well, next time I guess.

So Ken and I went to lunch yesterday as well and we went to the Alt Berliner Bier Salon (if you remember, it was where I had breakfast the first two mornings I was in Berlin).  I had a really good Schnitzel and fries and then we headed off our separate ways.  I should mention here that I wasn't exactly sure why Ken was in Berlin.  He has recently been traveling in Spain and France.  One place he went, I knew he went to see the band, Rammstein in concert.  I'm vaguely familiar with their music, they're kind of hard rock.  Then, it occurred to me that he was a GROUPIE!!!!  I just about laughed my butt off.  I shared this with him and he finally just gave in that he is a bit of a groupie, but he doesn't go to every one of their concerts, but a lot of them.  Apparently it rained like crazy the whole time last night, but he still had a blast.  You go, Ken!!!! You're a better man than I....

Today after church we got together again for coffee and a slice of pizza on "Alex" again.  Then he had to get to the airport to go home.  Wow, I can't remember the last time I just hung out with someone and chatted about everything.  It was really a great weekend.  We had been talking about having this meeting since he moved to Zurich last year.  I love it when you can check something like that off a "want to do" list to a "done" list.  Thanks, Ken, for being here in Berlin this weekend, it was great to have my first official visit by someone I knew from Spokane. :)

So, finally for tonight, I was super encouraged last night to get together with some folks to watch the UEFA European championship soccer game.  For the first time in the history of this league, it was the first time 2 German teams faced off together.  The league includes 3 or 4 teams from (I believe) all European countries, so I was super encouraged that my former hometown team, Bayern München (Munich) was in the finals.  This was like the Superbowl of European soccer, so it was a really big deal, watched by millions and millions of people all over the world.  So, anyway, to make a short story long, Bayern WON!!  I had my scarf on to support the team. I'm sure that's why they won!  Well, probably because they are just an amazing team, but it was a ton of fun watching the game.  I think I might have to watch more soccer.  For those who know me, that's kind of a big deal because in the States I used to only watch the Seahawks football, and like NOTHING else.  Hm, I think I might be becoming a European after all.  I think I can deal with that. :)

Well, I'm sure there is more I could ramble on about, but I think I will hang up my pen for the evening.  I do have a few things I have to do tonight because starting tomorrow, I will be hitting the streets to personally market myself to hotels in the touristy areas of the city.  Wish me luck, cross your fingers, push your thumbs, pray, send good vibes and thoughts for me this week, cuz I need to find a job!  Thanks for checking in on me!

The Ballet Tonight... that's right, I said ballet....

Good morning!  As I begin to write tonight's blog, I just returned home and it is currently 12:52 a.m.  That means, it will likely be a short one tonight, but then again I give you plenty to read anyway, so maybe this will be a nice respite from long blogs.  But who knows....

So last week Larry (the guy who runs the library) asked me if I would be going to see a special ballet that is happening at the Baptist church across the street from the library where I hang out.  I sort of hemmed and hawed and finally decided I should go.  They have been announcing it at church because the daughter of one of the disciples is dancing in it!  Well, this particular company, Ballet Magnificat! is a christian ballet company out of Jackson, Mississippi.  Well, as much as I hate to admit it, it was really cool.  Now, this isn't your ordinary ballet or ballet company.  They actually try to interact with the audience and they did a story tonight about the Exodus of the Israelites from Egypt.  I went in thinking, meh, whatever, I have nothing better to do tonight and I don't have TV, so this give me something to do.

I'm so glad I went!  These dancers were AMAZING! Very unique and not your average ballet story either. They have two shows, the second is tomorrow night.  I'm definitely going back again!

So, after the show tonight, I got a chance to speak with one of the dancers, Jonathan (sp?) and we got to talking a bit and he shared with me how he got into ballet.  He was very energetic on stage and incredibly talented!  I was so blown away by his, and well everyone else's performances, as well.  Anyway, I shared with him about my journey here and he told me he was very overwhelmed by my story.  He asked if we could pray and we did. Right there in the auditorium.  I was very encouraged by his prayer and began to really realize that my story is (how do I say this?) very unique.  I'm also starting to realize how powerful God has allowed it to be for people.  I'm not sure how to wrap my mind around that, honestly, but it is.

After the dancers got all done with their stuff, they came across the street to Connections and we got to sit down and chat with them as they ate.  I was just really blown away by this ministry of theirs. It's one of the coolest ministries I've ever encountered.  They shared with me how they went to Asia last year and were so moved by the serving hearts of the Asian people and by the orphans.  I got a chance to really talk more in depth with Bethany, one of the dancers.  It was really powerful.  On this tour, they've visited Israel, Kosovo, Linz Austria, and Nuremberg and Stuttgart.  Berlin is their last city before they return home this weekend. Anyway, if any of you dancers are reading this, thank you for sharing your amazing talents and your stories!

Anyway, I definitely plan on returning for their show tomorrow night.  Can't wait.  I never ever ever thought I'd say that about a ballet. I've been to ballets before and didn't like them.  This one was great.  I didn't hear one person say they didn't like it tonight.

Well, I had better wrap up here, it was a short 21-minute session tonight.  I need to get to be now so thanks for checking up on me.  Have a great Wednesday!

Busy but Encouraging Weekend & Week Ahead

It's been a really good weekend for me.  It's Monday night and it's just now coming to an end. Sad.  Well, Saturday was not terribly encouraging because I was still kind of getting over the last bit of my cold.  Now, I hope to be back, more or less, to abnormal.  :)  As usual, I have very much been looking forward to church because it's such a great opportunity to not only worship, but to also just see people I know and meet other new people.  It's super encouraging.  I'm really starting to feel like I really belong here.  I feel very embraced and "taken care of" by the members of the church.  So many have told me they are praying for me to find a job and not have to go back to the states.  That means so much to me, you can't even imagine.

Friday night we had a devotional at Connections which is always super encouraging.  There was probably about 30 people there which pretty much fills up their back room.  Afterward, I was planning on just heading home, but as we were passing "Doree" Steak House, some of the sisters invited us over to their table as we were walking by the restaurant.  So Steffen and I sat down with them and we had Anka, Christina Channell, Christiana, Cynthia and one other as well there (can't for the life of me remember now), but we sat around and ate pizza and laughed and had a good time.  The weather was amazing and even at 10:30 at night, it was really pleasant.

After service on Sunday, I was going to hang out with Steffen and some others to see Carnival of Cultures, which is a huge celebration with parades and food where all of the cultures in Berlin come out to show their stuff and offer their foods and sell stuff from their lands.  Sounds amazing, but with me just getting over a cold, felt like it might be too much for me on Sunday.  The day before, I had asked on facebook for anyone I know in Berlin if they are selling a bicycle or if they know of anyone who is.  One brother offered a bike he has but needs some work. I am totally happy to do that kind of stuff and he said that he would like to work on it together.  Sounds great!  So he and his wife invited me over to lunch after church and we sat out on his balcony in the amazing warmth of the May sun, ate lunch and just chatted for hours.  It was great!  Then we looked at the bike and I was surprised how nice it was.  It needed a couple things but honestly it didn't look too bad.  He is going to order some parts and hopefully in the next couple weeks I will have a bike to ride.  Thanks, God!

Also at church, I was invited to dinner by another brother who wanted to help me with my employment stuff.  His wife made a yummy tuna dish and we ate and he showed me some more hints on how to make my resume/CV exceptional.  We also went over how I should introduce myself and what I should say to people when I go into hotels to "market" myself.  I think I should be able to find work relatively quickly doing it this way.  That would seriously encourage my heart right now! (Not that it isn't already).  Anyway, I was very proud of myself because with free lunch and dinner, I only spent about $1.70 the entire day!!! Thanks again God for helping me watch my budget!

On Friday, the H.O.P.E. Senior Center in Berlin had their open house.  I had let them know that I would be interested in helping them, but when we got there, they didn't need help, per se.  It was really great to see some older folks have some place to go for fellowship, games, a cup of coffee and great volunteers to just share their lives with.  For the seniors that weren't able to go to the Open House, they have volunteers go to retirement homes to meet people there and to spend time with them.  I am very excited to start that in the next couple weeks sometime too.

I remember when I was still living in Seattle in 1999, we, as H.O.P.E. volunteers went to a retirement home in Juanita (right next to where I used to live) and I remember talking to this very sweet 86 year old woman who was from Cashmere.  I remember she didn't have much, but there was a small bowl of hard candies on her table.  I'm not much of a fan of hard candies, but I wasn't about to refuse this woman's offer. It meant a lot to her to be able to share those with me and another sister.  She told us this story:  It was sometime in the 1920's and living in Cashmere, which is near the mountains and very cold in the winter, her "bus driver" would heat large rocks on his wood stove at night and when they got into what is essentially a horse-drawn covered sleigh, he would put the hot rocks at their feet to keep them warm on the way to school.  That story has stayed with me over the last 14 years.  I don't think I'll ever forget that sweet lady or her amazing story. I do believe that is also the reason it has been on my heart to work with seniors ever since then, though I say to my shame that I didn't do anything about it in Spokane, even though a large retirement home was just a few blocks from my house.

Also at the Senior Center, I met this older man, Hans.  Hans looks to be about 75-80 or so and in exceptionally good shape for his age.  Very sharp mind and it actually looked like he might work out. Anyway, images of Jack Lalanne came to mind when I saw him.  Anyway, I told him that I applied for a job where the only thing in their requirements I lacked was experience using PowerPoint.  He said he could show me, so I will go there tomorrow and he's going to teach me how to use it!  Super cool!  It feels weird to go to a senior center to do it, but the H.O.P.E. people said it was totally fine.  And it's a free service, too!  Yay!  By the way, this guy totally reminded me of my good friend, Don C back in Spokane.  Now, Hans is significantly older than Don, but the likeness is pretty striking!  I sent Don an email about it, I hope it's not too  weird to share what with him what he might look like in 40 years.... LOL.

For the rest of the week, I have so much to do.  Spending the mornings marketing myself to hotels in tourist areas, re-writing my resume' and cover letters, getting a haircut, dressing up every day, etc.  Also, on Thursday, I will be going to a school here to see what the chance is for me to start classes in the Fall (as a possible option.  I would prefer to work, but would also really like to get my Bachelor's Degree, too) We'll see what God has in store for me in work/school.

This coming Saturday we will be doing a "hike" in NW Berlin (Spandau) which I'm very excited about. I hope that lots of disciples are able to come.  Also, Saturday is the final game of the European finals, Bayern München vs. Dortmund (two German teams!!) and I'm super excited to see that!  Also, my friend Ken will be here from Zürich!  I can't wait for this weekend!  It seems weird that I'm starting to feel busy now.  That's a really good thing!  I'm excited to start ramping things up in my daily life and in my personal ministry.

Well, I think that needs to be it for tonight.  Thanks for looking in on me!