I had a crazy day today. Usually once a month or so I work on a Saturday and today was the day... It's usually pretty quiet, and today was especially so for most of the day. But people were high touch, cranky and battled everything I told them. I was pretty exhausted at the end of the day.
But a part of my morning was also not so encouraging. After putting over $4200 into my car since February, I had a warning on my dash about low tire pressure on my BRAND NEW tires. I had had it! Enough was finally enough and I yelled at God saying that I can't afford to put any more money into the car! (A little foreshadowing maybe?...)
So I'm looking at buying a used car up on Camano Island, a little over an hour from my work. I was supposed to go up today to do a quick repair, check a few things out and hopefully finish the deal. But I couldn't risk damaging my new, and very expensive, tires.
Since I get off early on Saturdays, I thought the tire shop had already closed. I stopped after work to get air, but then realized that the shop didn't close until 5! There's a chance I could actually make it before they closed and not have to wait until Monday.
My last call of the day was at 3:59:50, 10 seconds before the end of my shift, and boy was I salty about that in my heart. The caller was also pretty salty, like many of my customers today.... I legitimately couldn't help him with everything today, but I was able to get off the call at a reasonable time.
But I was still faithless about getting my flattening tire fixed today....
But I prayed anyway. Still faithless. I forced myself to repeat, "they'll get it done today", "they'll get it done today." I arrived 15 minutes before closing time, much like the gentleman I just spoke with 40 minutes prior. And I thought wow, now I'm on the receiving end of being that guy who comes in at the very end of someone's shift asking for help. I was super convicted!
As I'm sure you can guess, they fixed my tire for me, even after I gave them my big sob story. How pathetic I must have sounded. Faithless, whiny, and frustrated by the day.... Kind of sick really. Not my proudest moment for sure.
But as is his custom, God came through. He always seems to, but not with a person with a bitter, unrepentant heart. Instead of going to Camano Island tonight, I decided that I needed to do some Doordashing to save up for Special Missions Contribution as well as my trip to Germany and England in August.
I got one very low-paying offer which I was grateful for, then no more orders for what seemed like an eternity. I almost gave up and went home, but I didn't. I was only a few blocks from home and decided to see if I could just get one more.
In the silence of the car, I said a quick prayer. I apologized to God for yelling at him earlier. Not only did it not cost me anything (Les Schwab offers free flat repairs! Hallelujah!), it was done before closing time (they didn't have to do that for me!) AND I made a little bit of money Doordashing tonight. A triple win!
I'm so grateful that God was quick to forgive and love me after my prayer, because only SECONDS after I apologized to Him (and two full hours after my last delivery!), I got a good-paying delivery, more than double my first one, a fourth win!
9 For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us. 10 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. 1 Cor. 7:9-10
Thank you God for humbling me tonight. You know exactly how to get my attention. Please help me in the future to be more pro-active in my humility, but thank you for believing in me, even when my heart is bitter. I love you and am so grateful for your incredible love and your incredible kingdom. Sorry for my complaining and lack of gratitude. You deserve much better than that from me!
It's important to write stuff down. Especially stuff like this. Occasionally I do re-read some of my posts, I hope God will allow me to read this one again some day. I'm sure on a day when I need a little reminder. Now off to bed, it's nearly 2 a.m. and I need to pray for some seriously deep sleep to make up for my late night.
Good night all, until next time! Vaya con dios!
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