I was reminded tonight of a dream. Not my dream and probably not yours either. It was the dream of an obscure, unattractive, frumpy 47-year old woman from Northern England. I remember the first time I heard the name Susan Boyle. I remember the first time I saw her amazing audition with Britain's Got Talent in April 2009. I remember seeing that video for the first time at a church service at the Portland Church of Christ. Just like everyone else, I was skeptical. This woman was an extremely unassuming type. If you look at her, you might think the things I mentioned above and write her off as just another sad old cat lady, as she admitted, had "never been kissed". You may have written her off: until you heard her sing.
Why did she make it to that audition that day? She was unemployed, so she probably had the time. But I don't think that's why. For 36 years (since 1975) she has been singing. Her family and friends had the amazing blessing of hearing the angelic vocals of this daughter or sister. Finally in 2009, something told Susan to break out, to see if she could make her mark on the world. In watching the video, Susan sings the song, the entire audience is on their feet nearly the whole time. And the judges jaws were lying on the table! She finishes, she blows a kiss and begins to walk off stage. Now, I'm sure she was just nervous, excited that she "rock(ed) that audience"! I could be wrong, but I think maybe she was just happy to have lived her dream: to sing in front of a large crowd. Maybe for just a moment, she thought: "I did it". In a sense, in that moment she could have died happy. Fortunately for the world, that's not what happened.
She had a dream, even her song was about having a dream. EVERYONE (including me) could not believe their ears. Susan made that fateful trip to greet the world that day. This 47-year old cat lady did it; she won the love and respect and the hearts of everyone who heard her sing. I have personally watched this video 30 or 40 times (possibly more) and it never fails to bring a tear to my eye. When you have a dream and God blesses it, it's the greatest thing in the world. Whether it's finding a spouse or singing in front of an audience, you cannot describe the complete and utter feeling of accomplishment and blessing in that moment. I'm sure Susan felt this strongly, and even after 4 years, may still be a bit in shock! I hope it has been everything for her that she hoped. If nothing else, it has certainly been a huge inspiration for me.
When I was still living in Spokane, I was with a very great, long-time friend, Jeff. I told Jeff about my dream and asked him what he thought. He was very supportive and since this was very early on in the process, he asked me, "If you didn't do this, would you regret it later?" The answer was very simple. Yes, I would regret not following my dream. I was ready, but I really appreciated his question. What is YOUR dream, reader? What do you want to accomplish in this life? You only have one chance to live it the way you want. Have you given up on your dreams? Are you comfortable in your life or are you willing to get uncomfortable in order to live your dream? It's hard work, it's uncomfortable, it's emotionally draining, but it's so amazing to live out your dream. Even if I had to leave Germany tomorrow, I still wouldn't regret my decision to come here, even if I had to return to nothing.
I am so blessed. My life is not without challenges, but I have God and an amazing support structure in my life. Do I want/need a job? Absolutely, and soon! Do I need a permanent place to live? Yes, but despite that, God has provided. Often, multiple options even! This has in some ways been the hardest and most humbling time in my life, but man, has God been working on my character. What else could anyone need? Even with very little, I feel like the richest guy in the world. By letting go, I have comfort in the safety of God's great strength and ability. God is the best, he's faithful, he knows even better then we do what we need, every aspect of our situations, and everything else that we don't even know we need to consider! He's all knowing and perfect. Let us not rely on ourselves, let's rely on God and only secondarily on the people he has put in our lives.
Finally, thank you to the anonymous reader that asked the first question on my ask.fm account. If you would like to see the question and answer, (it was a GREAT question), please click on: http://ask.fm/amerigerman
The video for Susan Boyle's 2009 Britain's Got Talent audition is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mS5Om47vsaA
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